I remember a feeling of helplessness when I would see Megan calling me on my cell phone. At first she just seemed a little homesick but then it turned into something more. She might call me at 4:30 am feeling like things were falling apart and then again at 8:00 am feeling like things were going to be ok. I also remember being extremely worried about visiting her in D.C. at the beginning of October. It was Kelly’s Fall Break and we were going to have a fun “girls visit”. My emotions were so mixed because I wanted to be there to support her but I was worried our visit would make things worse for Megan.
The visit really opened my eyes that she was going through something more than a little homesickness. She spent as much time as she could with us including sleeping at the hotel. It was then I saw she was having a great deal of trouble sleeping. She would be crying in the middle of the night worried about us leaving her. She spent so much time watching the clock that she couldn’t really enjoy our time together. She started telling me that she wanted to change her major. Then she went on to say she only wanted to stay in D.C. for a year. That changed to a semester. By the time Kelly and I left for Phoenix she was practically beside herself because she couldn’t go home with us. It really broke my heart.
As I mom I was torn between wanting to get her a ticket and bringing her home with me and telling her everything was going to be alright and that things would get better. I tried to remain strong and tell her she could do it if she kept trying and reminding her how much she loved Musical Theatre. She was trying so hard to be strong and stick with her decision but I realize now that what she was facing was overwhelming for anyone…especially an 18-year-old girl so far away from home. What I really wanted was to talk to my mom and get her advice. Since that wasn’t possible I prayed to her for guidance instead.
The visit really opened my eyes that she was going through something more than a little homesickness. She spent as much time as she could with us including sleeping at the hotel. It was then I saw she was having a great deal of trouble sleeping. She would be crying in the middle of the night worried about us leaving her. She spent so much time watching the clock that she couldn’t really enjoy our time together. She started telling me that she wanted to change her major. Then she went on to say she only wanted to stay in D.C. for a year. That changed to a semester. By the time Kelly and I left for Phoenix she was practically beside herself because she couldn’t go home with us. It really broke my heart.
As I mom I was torn between wanting to get her a ticket and bringing her home with me and telling her everything was going to be alright and that things would get better. I tried to remain strong and tell her she could do it if she kept trying and reminding her how much she loved Musical Theatre. She was trying so hard to be strong and stick with her decision but I realize now that what she was facing was overwhelming for anyone…especially an 18-year-old girl so far away from home. What I really wanted was to talk to my mom and get her advice. Since that wasn’t possible I prayed to her for guidance instead.
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